Caught red handed......

As I have mentioned in previous posts I live in a house share for time being. Its a big old Victorian house and there is 5 of us living here.

Im the only one who doesnt have a 9-5 job, so my time routine is somewhat "off" from the others, which means I never eat at the same time as they do, I dont get up at the time they do so I never have to stand in line for any of the bathrooms.

This suits me perfectly since I somehow feel that the house is actually mine and i live here on my own (the fact that I never venture past the 2nd floor and dont even know what it looks like up there doesnt matter, I hate stairs)

I suppose this has spoiled me somehow and Im not as careful as maybe I should be when I walk around the house in my underwear, (I am after all swedish...) but I have never even bumped into anyone on the stairs after having a shower when Im wrapped in one towel and got another wrapped "turban style" round my hair.



So if I wake up during the night because "nature calls" I just go to the loo in my pj's and dont really think any more about it...

Or at least up until last night....

To make the matters worse yeaterday was laundry day so instead of my pj's I slept in a vest and my knickers.

At 03.14 I woke up feeling like my bladder was about to explode so I litterally threw myself out of bed and aimed for the bathroom.

I was to say the least surprised to bump into my "neighbour" who lives in the room next to me.

He had obviously just been to the bathroom and was on his way back to bed, however he is dressed very respectable in a dressing gown and slippers..

He looked chocked to see me aswell and the vest is a bit "washed out" and barely covers my modesty but its perfect to sleep in.

We mumbled "Oh..sorry" to each other and went our separate ways.



Once in the bathroom I wanted to bang my head against the wall and I kept repeating to myself: "Dressing gown!! Dressing gown! Wear it for goodness sake..."



I finished my business and as I opened the door there is my other neighbour! Who lives in the room above me....

She is also wearing a dressing gown!

She looked at me in what can only be described as pure horror!

Again I mumbled "oh..sorry" and hurried down the stairs and into my own safe bedroom.



Note to self: Wear your dressing gown!

I have now decided to hibernate in my bedroom and only come out at night, mind you it seems like there is a lot of traffic on the stairs even during the nocturnal hours in this house

Butterflies....

Ive just come home from visiting a dear friend, we ate some pasta and then went for a drive around the area that used to be an island and where we live.
We drove past a young couple wrapped around each other in a tight embrace, Im not sure if my friend noticed them but it took me back to a similar night 3 years 2 months and 8 days ago...
I recieved a txt and a challenge to meet him on the beach.
My hands and legs were shaking and the butterflies in my belly was doing the jig, but i was wearing the biggest smile you could imagine.
We ended up sitting in a dark carpark talking for four hours listening to a silly song about a womans "humps".
It was a magic night and I thanked my lucky star for this gorgous hunk of a man that was in my little bubble with me.
And then he kissed me....I still remember the tingly feeling, I remember thinking that had I not already been sitting down my legs would have given way. And then the butterflies in my belly slowed down to a seducive "bumb 'n grind"....

Sleepless nights

Last night was to say the least restless, I didnt actually get to sleep until around 05.00 this morning..

So Ive only had aproximately 4 hrs sleep, still I feel wide awake.

I dont have these nights very often, I love to sleep and can fall asleep in a noisy nightclub if I wanted to (and I have done, however it might also have been helped by the amount of alcohol that was in my body at the time)

So what was it that was occupying my thoughts last night? What made it impossible for me to shut my eyes and get some rest?
Why cant our brains "shut off" but sometimes - or quite often for some people - work overtime going over and over the days events?

I can understand people who have very exciting lives were intresting things happen all the time and they obviously need to relive all the magic again.
I would...

Today will be spent doing laundry and relaxing, I might catch up on some sleep or my body might decide that ive had enough and wont get to rest until tonight

The velvet hour....

Its now 02:45 am and Im still awake...my friend calls this time of night "The velvet hour", Im not 100% sure of what she means by it but I think it sounds so poetic and romantic.
Like this is the time when you will have sleepy whispering conversations with your loved one, who is warm and gorgeous next to you.
Or if you have ever seen "The Exorcist of Emily Rose" you know that in about 15 mins the devil and other demons will take posession of your mind, body and soul and slowly destroy you.
I have only seen parts of the film i.e the parts where the priest is in court trying to explain what Emily has been posessed by.
The parts where she actually is posessed I spent behind a cussion. Terrified.

But back to my velvet hour..
I have no loved one to whisper sweet nothings to next to me.
Instead I have a family sized dairy Milk Bubbles, a litre carton of orange and mango juice and watching Sex And The City.
If I turned the sound down I might hear the silence of the house and hopefully I wont get posessed by any kind of demons

Revenge is sweet?

Unfortunately Im not one of these people who can just let things that upset and anger me just wash over me, say I am fabolous! and then just carry on with my life as if that thing never happened.
I see red, scream, shout and stomp my feet....
Then I start planning my revenge
I might not always carry out what I have planned, but just thinking about what I will do makes me feel so much better.
Im now planning again, and this time I think I will actually carry it all out....
For obvious reasons I cant give the details away here.
Yet.....
I was thinking, should I do it?
Will it make me feel better?
Or will i come across as the sad bitter bitch?
Thats why it has to be done carefully and at just the right time.....

I will keep you posted

Why am I here?

As time is drawing closer to my move from England and back to Sweden I have found myself looking back on my time here.
People ask me why i moved here in the first place since sweden is such a beautiful country?
The answer to that is pure and simple: A man......
7 months previously I had returned home from a year working as an Au-pair in England with a heavy suitcase and an even heavier heart.
I met G.F in a London club, he was the best looking, handsome and generally gorgeous man I had ever met, and without a doubt, the best my fairly inexperienced lips had ever puckered up to.
I nearly missed the last bus home that night, my friends had wanted to go home hours ago but being true friends they just waited for my at the bus stop although not without some very grumpy faces and gruntling at me.
Somehow I didnt care, I just carried on smiling and looking dreamily out of the window.

So he is the reason why I came here with an even heavier suitcase and my big teddy bear on my arm that sunny day in April 1998.
Me and G.F didnt end up living happily ever after as my heart desired, but its ok, I met some other amazing men instead...
But that is a subject for another day

Its official......

Ok, so I took the decission to make my blog a bit more public by putting the link for each entry on facebook.
It has taken me 3 days and several emails to helpful and vastly computer savvy friends on "how to get the link into the status square"
Jeez, I didnt realise you needed a degree.....
But here it is!
Hopefully there will be more.....hopefully I will get a bit more savvy myself....

It is obviously putting some pressure on me to actually write it, preferably every day.....
And by doing this I will hopefully further develop my vocabulary and who knows maybe I will become computer litterate.
The next step is to learn how to put pictures on here, but before i do that i will need to learn how to download the photos to my laptop.
As you can see i have a long way to go..
I better start now....