New Friends

Yesterday I was invited to Sara's house for a "Chick Flick feast", I brought lots of my chick flicks and a big bag of pick and mix. Linda came too, she brought crisps, dips and another chick flick. Sara had made waffles when I arrived and we settled with her two boys to indulge them with icecream, whipped cream and strawberry jam. It was, to say the least, "a perfect yum"
The boys (who will soon be young men) went upstairs to use their computers, sing or read or whatever it is that preteens do to entertain themselves these days.

We watched "The Proposal" with Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. I have seen it a few times already, but it is turning into one of my favourite films.
After the film Sara prepared dinner. Me and Linda sat in her kitchen talking about everything and nothing, love, men and life.
Linda is a colleague turned good friend of Sara whom I have met a few times at dinners and parties at Saras house. I always thought she seemed really friendly and fun to be around but we never had a real opportunty to talk and get to know each other. Last night we did have time though and it was so nice to have some quality girltime with great women. Whilst we were chopping and preparing and talking, another friend of Saras came around, Jane. I have never met her before but she too was lovely, easy to talk to and she had a great infectious laugh. The evening was happy, we shared a lot about our lives and I now feel that I have got two new friends, who knows, maybe they will become great friends, but if not there will be two more girls I can chat drunkenly to at the next crayfish party at Sara's house.

During our girly evening Sara's husband and sons stayed well out of the way, something I found.... so kind and nice..They ate in the kitchen, offered to cook more pasta and then went to their bedroom to watch tv and dvds.
I honestly dont know any other man who would just stay out of the way like that while his wife is having a party. Or entertaining guests.
He is a very nice, understanding man, Sara's husband.

I drove home around midnight and fell into bed and slept like a baby until nine am today. The clocks went forward last night so the time is now nearly half past twelve and I am still in my pyjamas, watching Ghost Whisperer. It is good, but really sad at the moment.
So what will I do with the rest of the day? I will go and see my parents at some point, but I think I need a walk in the beautiful sunny weather first.

I remember this time last year..my last day at work in England. It is soon a year since I came back. But that need and deserves a post of its own..

Have a great sunday all.

Mystery solved

I saw the doctor yesterday, they took some tests and found out that I have a strong infection in my body. They just couldnt find where...not in the ears or throat this time, not in the kidneys or in in my lungs. They prescribed some antibiotics and told me to come back on monday if I didnt feel better.
I had a dentist appointment in the afternoon and guess what showed up on the X-rays... A huge infection! It looked disgusting, but thankfully there is no serious damage, it will all be cleared up with penicillin. I feel better all ready and I can go back to work on monday. Next week is the easter holidays, I am really looking forward to it, the school holidays are a lot of fun with different activities and funtimes.

I have been in such a good mood today, the sun has been shining, I went to the gym and had a great workout, (without puking) I cooked stuffed peppers for dinner and saved a couple for that day when I cant be bothered to cook.
I have had a deep conditioner on my hair and a "saunamask" on my face.
I bought "Ghostwhisperer" series 4 today. One of my favourite shows of all time - together with a few more...
So, sorry cant concentrate too well...
Have a good night.



Trailer for series 4, and I have just realised there is also a series 5.....
Cant wait for that to come out....

What is going on...?

I went back to work today, I rode my new bike that I bought yesterday which was nice although it felt weird to turn since I havent even sat on a bike for thirteen years...
After twenty minutes at work I started feeling really weird, I could hear that my colleagues were talking but I couldnt hear what they said, I felt sick, dizzy and feared that would faint.
I went to the toilet and put my head between my knees, a trick my mum taught me when I was a child and sometimes felt dizzy as a side effect for growing very tall very quickly..I dont know for sure how long I sat like that but someone came and asked ig I was ok and if I needed help?
It was decided that I needed to go home again and I called my mum who came to collect me.
I felt better after a while but a strange headache had taken my head and face hostage. My mum took me home where I slept for three hours. I feel better now, but I am not 100% to be honest, I called my doctor and the nurse told me to go to the emergency room if I didnt get better or I could make an appointment tomorrow morning. I am opting for the latter, the thought of sitting in the waitingroom of the hospital all night is just not appealing.

My poor mum is worried sick, which makes me feel really bad.
Most people probably thinks it strange that my parents are as involved in my life as they are, it is fine, they can think that. I guess there are a few reasons to it... I am an only child
I moved abroad when I was young, only 20 years old. Eventhough I thought at the time that I was streetwise and knew how to handle life, I was SO wrong.
I like to spend time with my parents, probably because in the past thirteen years we have only seen each other twice a year for a very intensive period of time. A week or two. So the fact that I now can see them for a couple of hours at a time a few times a week feels great. Anyone who thinks that is just bizarre, well, that is their problem really. Not mine.

I will stay at home for the rest of the week, on orders form my colleagues.
It is a nice change when the people you work with and for actually belives that you are ill, I have had several managers and colleagues in the past who thinks that you are just not bothered to come into work and are sitting at home enjoying yourself instead.
So I will see my doctor tomorrow, maybe he will send me for tests and we shal see if there is anything wrong with me, or if I am just suffering from a spot of hypochondira?
Going to bed soon, with my book and hopefully getting some rest.

Night all.

It will get better, they say....

I know how you feel, I really do..and I know what is going on in your head and the pain that is in your heart. You think that tomorrow will be better, but actually it will be worse. And the day after that will be just as bad and just as painful as yesterday was. Your friends will tell you that you are better off without him, and maybe you are, but it will take time for your heart to catch up with those thoughts. You can talk to me, I wont tell you to stop going on about him, because I know how much that hurts too. And I know what it is like when people think that you are over it, because you are smiling and laughing again. Yes life goes on, you wont stop breathing and your heart is still in the same place as before, even though it feels like it has been wripped out of your chest and put in a food blender.

I wish I could say that it will get better, that he wasnt the one for you, and that the man of your dreams is waiting just around the corner. But I cant. I am sure you will meet someone else, but I do not know if you will love like that again.
Maybe you dont actually want to love anyone else again.
Only can figure that out, only you can give yourself enough time to get over him, and stop being a hero, it is ok to be sad.
There is no time limit on how long you are allowed to grieve.
I am here for you, always.

YUK.....

I felt a bit iffy when I woke up this morning, sickly feeling in my stomack but starving hungry at the same time. I managed to eat a slice of toast and thought that if I just got going and got to work I would feel better. But I didnt. So I went home after an hour and spent a few hours with my head down the toilet. Not pleasant at all I tell you.
I went to sleep and woke after three hours and felt better, although shaky and with a sore tummy.
After drinking some water I felt even better and settled to watch "New Moon" for the third time. It is still fantastic! I want to be a vampire...

I made some phonecalls and managed to get "Medborgarskolan" off my back trying to charge me for a course I never attended, that I didnt even sign up for. Cheeky buggers trying to get more money from me...
I will stay at home tomorrow aswell, just to make sure I dont give anyone else my "bug" or whatever this is Ive got (no it is not a baby bug)


I found this song on spotify earlier on, and remembered how much I loved it. My boyfriend at the time bought his album for me. I very rarely think about him these days, but sometimes I wonder what kind of life I would have had today if I never broke up with him? I sometimes loose myself in "what if" thoughts, not in a really bad way, just lighthearted thoughts such as "what if I never broke up with my first english boyfriend when I did? would we have got married and had children? or would he have driven me totally bonkers so I had escaped back to Sweden a long time ago?

I think it is best for us all to believe that "what is ment to be, will be" and "everything happens for a reason". Otherwise there would probably be a lot more people with mental health problem than there is today.
Anyway, enjoy the song.

Oh what a day

I woke up early this morning and went to the shop to get the bits and pieces I never got yesterday. It was lovely and deserted and I was done in a mere half hour. I then picked up my mum and we went to the gym.
I over did it on the treadmill and puked in the bin (yes I am disgusting today aswell..) why do I never learn?
I do it everytime after I have had a bit of a break from exercising..thinking that I have to so much to catch up and I end up in a wet puddle on the floor. I am such an amateur. Bless me.
When I got home I had a warm shower, washed my hair and curled up in front of the tv to watch "New Moon", SO good!!!
It has been raining all day so I allowed myself to just chill indoors, just wish there would have been a thunderstorm and the weather would have been perfect.
I know I am weird, but I love the rain. Although not when I want to sit outside and have a BBQ..I like warm summer evenings, on those evenings the rain better stay away.

Gonna leave you with a grat song by Alicia Keys and Jay-Z. I hope I get to go to New York one day.
Sleep well all.

I am a disgusting person!

Last week we came to the conclusion that I am still not an adult, but more like a teenager or possibly even a child...
This week I think I am also turning into a man..or a boy..or maybe I should say a young man..I will explain:

This week has been pretty busy, fun, but busy. I have been out every night, training and catching up with friends. I havent got indoors before nine on any night so Ive really just slept here this week.
So when I came home this afternoon after a traumatic experience in the shop (a billion people crammed in the foodaisles) I opened my fridge and nearly threw up...I am ashamed to tell you that there was food that nearly crawled out on its own..
So not only am I not an adult (clearly...an adult wouldnt leave food in a fridge for that long..) I am turning into a nineteen year old boy who has just left his parents house and is living in his first apartment on his own.
And to top it all off, I have ripped my favourite pair of jeans and I went to work with a foodstain on my jumper today.
Can a person get more disgusting?

I guess one could, I could have gone to work without showering...but I did shower everyday, today I have even showered twice..
I am slumped in the chair, candles are lit, I am watching Twilight (the sequel New Moon is out tomorrow!!!) and I have hung the laundry..
It has been a blissful friday afternoon/evening, I will soon go to bed for an early night.



Really like this song! Powerful and aggressive, perfect to go running with this song playing in your headphones. Shame I do not run very much..

Love.....

We were given: Two hands to hold. To legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find.


Some beautiful words I read today..

Are you an adult or a youngster?

It has been, to say the least, a busy week. Work has been good, I just want to say that I have great colleagues in my unit. They make me laugh and the days pass quickly and I dont even mind getting up at six am everyday. But once I get home I realise how tired I am and dont turn the tv or computer on for at least an hour.

Yesterday I went to Sara's for dinner, I wanted to treat her to dinner, but since my flat is just not suitable for entertaining I brought the food to hers. I made tacos (which someone earlier on had pointed out was SO '90s...) and even though the avocado was too hard to make guacamole of, and I had left the chocolate sauce for the dessert somewhere along the way it was a very good night and the food went down a treat.
I dont know if I have told you before but Sara is my oldest friend, we were just teeny tiny babies when we got to know each other at nurseryschool. We used to hide underneath the table where I cut her hair... In most of the group photos Sara is sporting a diagonal fringe and uneven layers...

Last night we talked about how "grown-up" we are, we took a test were you get points for how many "adult" things we have or do i.e clubcard in the grocery store, hatchback, houseloan, children, married, soduko, bath without wetting your hair...well, you get the picture.
Sara was convinced she wouldnt get many adult points at all since she doesnt feel like a grown up..she got 56 out of 86 which earned her the comment "Mature mother"
I only got 12 grown-up points and was told to "get a haircut and a job"
12 out of 86..I am still just a teenager at heart..living in my basementflat, with no real responsibilities apart from getting to work on time, paying the rent on time and paying my phonebill every month.

We stayed up til around midnight when I just couldnt keep my eyes open anymore (I should get adult points for that..) and I went to sleep in her oldest sons bed (who stayed at a friends house) and I slept til half past seven this morning (should also get some adult points for that..)
We had breakfast, all the while Sara's youngest son entertained us with "Run to the hills" by Iron Maiden, played over and over again, not always the whole song, but just the first guitarr solo. Which to be fair is the best part..
Sara and her family was going out with with the caravan (LOTS of adult points for having a caravan...) so my mum picked me up (no adults points for that...) and we drove to Ikea so I could buy some candles and other bits. I love living so close to Ikea.
I bought some tulips aswell to bring the spring into my flat (surely that should give me at least one adult point..) and when i came home I lit lots of candles and tucked myself up in bed after doing the launry and washing my hair.
It has been a very good day, I feel more relaxed and closer to having my batteries fully charged. But I will probably go to bed really early, just to be nice to myself (and again, there should be adultpoints for going to bed before ten, at least on a weekend)

I will leave you with the song that has been played in my head since eight o'clock this morning. Enjoy and thanks Lucas. x

Naptime..

It has been a good day, I have great colleagues who make the days at work fly by with lots of laughter and smilies.
I went for the swimming lesson and swam for an hour, it is great to be able to exercise during working hours isnt it?
When I came home I felt drained and exhausted and thought to myself: "I will have a nap for an hour before I cook dinner" so thinking that I would sleep for an hour or so I tucked myself into bed. Only to wake up three hours later wondering what happened?
Makeup staines on my sheets and my hair looking close to a birdsnest. So I had a warm shower, washed my hair, hung the laundry and cooked dinner.

Tomorrow is my dads birthday, I will have dinner with him and my mum and celebrate a little bit, well as much as he wants to, my little dad doesnt want a fuss and he doesnt want anyone to spend any money on presents for him.
Wich makes it a bit difficult to find a present for him.
This year however, I have bought the dvds "The girl who played with fire" and "The girl who blew the hornets nest". The films from the books by Stieg Larsson which he really liked. So hopefully he will like them.

I am looking forward to the weekend. Meeting with Sara on friday for some girlie time with food and wine, then there is only sleep planned and I might possibly go for a long walk if the weather permitts.

Well I am sensing that the words arent coming easily this evening, so I will bid you a good night and hope life is good your end.
I want to play a song....
This makes me think of summernights...oh how I long for them... hopefully it wont take too long until they are here and we can spend time watching the sun go down.

Social Networking

I have for quite some time been wondering and pondering about the phenomenom that is social networking i.e Facebook, Twitter, Plurk etc etc...
I am a member of facebook and Twitter, Twitter works like the statusbox on facebook, you basically just write a scentance or a link to another page.
You can then follow other "twitters" and see other peoples tweets (yes that is what it is called)
The thing that baffles me is, when you see that some twitters are following 10000 people....
How do you have time to read all of those???
Today I decided to delete those who isnt following me...and in doing so my followers dropped radically....weird....

Have had a chilled out day today, mum came over for a cup of tea and a chat, then I had a nap in my chair, whilst watching "Interview with a vampire".
Will have an early night tonight aswell I think and carry on reading my book "Ego Girl" by Carolina Gynning. She won the Swedish Big Brother 2004 and is now a tv presenter (surprise surprise!) from what I can understand she is one of those girls you either love or hate, but since I lived in England during 2004 I know nothing about her, so I thought I would read the book she has written and see what I think.
She is from my part of Sweden so we have the same accent (sort of...her accent is a bit "over the top"..)
So far I like the book, it is an easy read about the sort of life I dreamed about when I was 16-25...sex, drugs and rock and roll....
I do however think it is very good that I never got close to a life like that.. I was so naive and gullable. I thought the best of everyone I met and couldnt think that anyone would intentionally try to hurt me.
I was also desperate for acceptance and popularity, I would have done absolutely anything for a man to "love" me.
So now I just enjoy reading the books about the girls, my heroines, who got in with the wrong crowd but managed to get out of it aswell, I probably wouldnt have done....

Well I am off to bed now people. Sleep well but first enjoy this song by another Swedish girl who I know nothing about, more than she is a singer...
Maybe she has written a book aswell?
It is in Swedish, sorry to you who dont understand it.

Exhale....

It is finally friday night. The week is over and I have time to relax, unwind and recharge my batteries. Even though I like my job and never feel it is really hard to get up in the mornings, it is nice to have some time to myself.
I read an article in a magazine about a woman who said that a job could be a dream job if you have good colleagues. So for the time being, I have my dream job.

Teddy is coming down from Stockholm tonight so we will meet up tomorrow. Not sure what we will do, dinner and wine or clubbing and coctails...we shal see what we decide.
I think tonight is the night for cosying up in bed with my book to be honest. I am tired and could do with catching up on some sleep.

I heard this beautiful song on Facebook yesterday, the lyrics are wonderful, the music is calm and has a "feelgood" factor to it.
To me, this is true love.

People People People......

Blogging hasnt really been coming to me in the last days..I havent got much inspiration I guess. A lot to do at work, and I have realised how low jealousy will make some people sink and how some people always will get away with being bullies if they just shed a few tears at the right time.
I am doing the best I can to stay positive and I hope that I am a better person for not spreading lies and keeping my dignity. Maybe I am naive, but I do believe that what goes around comes around and if you are true to yourself and treat other people the wayyou want to be treated, the sun might shine on you a bit more and the bitterness wont eat you up.
Unfortunately there will always be they who are not happy unless others are unhappy, I just hope I will always have the strenght not to become one of them.
I pray that my life will contain more exciting, inspirational people and projects to make me strong to turn my back to nasy, bitter gossip.
That is not to say that gossipping about if Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt will get back together or not wont be on the cards...

Will they, wont they...? Hope they will.....

The snow is finally gone and I feel the spring is in the air, although it is still freezing cold. My flat is pretty cold aswell, I am wrapped in a blanket with fluffy socks and slippers and my nose is streaming.
Tonight is the night when lots of new programmes start again.
Desperate Housewives in an hour which I am most excited about.
I really want something sweet to eat, but have nothing at home.
The question is, do I run up to the shop and get something quickly? Or do I stay at home and be good?

Erm....1....2.....3.........
Im off to the shop for sweets!!!