The difference is in the pro's and con's

As I said a few days ago I want to write about the differences with living in Sweden and living in England. And also about the difference between English people and Swedish people.
Before I start I have to say, that what I am about to write is written with a lot of love and humour, and it is written straight from my heart. There is absolutely no intention of upsetting or hurting anyone, I am just writing what I see and have experienced. And if I still manage to upset anyone I will apologise now. And also tell you not to be so sensitive... ;-)

So where do I start...I think work is the best place, since it is here that I find the biggest difference.
It's no secret that I have struggled to get to terms with the way employment works in Sweden. If you havent got a university degree you are not worth a lot. I have been to interviews where the person interviewing me has flicked through my CV and then sighed..."Dont you have any qualifications..??"
So I have explained that yes I qualified as a "child carer" in college and I have an NVQ 3 aswell, and I then get another sigh "What is an NVQ?? That is to no use here"
I have left interviews in tears more than once...And how much do you want to work at a place when you have been reduced to tears even before you even start?
You get nowhere without a degree in Sweden, and whereas I obviously think that an education is important, I think there are some things you cant be taught from a book, you have to learn by doing it and get the experience by working and making mistakes.
However, if you get sick, the support is much better in Sweden than in England. I have worked for managers who have told me that they dont believe people who say they are too sick to work, it is just a way to get a few extra day off..
In a way I can see their point, I have met more lazy people in England than in Sweden. I have met people who dont care about their colleagues who have to work twice as hard when they are just relaxing at home with their family or getting drunk in the pub. But it is not very nice when you have to make that phonecall telling your boss that you are not able to make it into work that day, when you are feeling like death warmed up, if it is with a rotten cold, stomach bug or tonsilitis and get the reply: "Hmphf, FINE! When will you come back?"
So it is a relief that when I had a week off work, my colleagues were generally concerned and when I came back they seemed happy that I felt better.

Another big difference between English people and Swedish people is family ties.
I have met many English people who has one or more close familymembers they dont speak to anymore. And I dont understand it at all, how can you fall out so badly with your mum or your sister that you just refuse to talk to them again. EVER?

Socialising in Sweden takes some planning...everyone is very organised and fill their diaries with social "appointments" months in advance. English people socialise in the pub, you go in, meet people you know and it is no big deal or weird at all to go out on your own if you go to your local pub.
To start off with we dont have pubs in Sweden, it is bars, bistros and restaurants. And only alcoholics or people with no friends go out on their own.
In Sweden we invite friends to our house for dinner, and most couples tear out their hair to try to make a perfect dinner and outdo the person they had dinner with the week before. You wouldn't serve spaghetti bolognese or lasagne at a dinner party...and you always serve at least three courses and coffee with possibly a liqoure after.
Whereas it is very rare to be invited to an English persons home. Someone once told me that English peoples house is the most sacred to them and they do not let people too close to themselves. If it is true or not I dont know...but I know that you socialise in a completely different way in Sweden and in England.
The relationship to alcohol is also like night and day.
Many English people will have a couple of drinks everyday. "Im just having a pint" or "Just a glass of wine". Whereas most Swedish people I know will only drink on weekends unless you are on holiday, and people will often take a month "off" alcohol. Especially just before or just after the annual holiday.
I cant say that I think one is better than the other. Meeting up with a bunch of girls at someones house, eating good food, drinking some nice wine and then just talk, gossip and laugh all evening before going home without feeling the need to go out and pull a man is priceless.
But it is also so much fun to throw on a pair of jeans, a top and high heals and go to the local pub, where most faces are familiar, you can sit in a relaxed environment have a conversation over a beer or glass of wine, whatever takes your fancy. Having quality time and playing pool with your man is also a treat.
I guess what I find the hardest to understand and get my head around is how Swedish people can live their lives so well organised and well planned. I wonder if they scedule their toilet breaks aswell?



So what else can I compare..?
The last thing that comes to mind is men...English blokes vs Swedish guys...
Swedish men and women are more equal than English men and women, these days there are no "stay at home mums" in Sweden. Your child gets 480 "parent days" and parents split those days between themselves in a way that suits the family. When the days are up, you go back to work, or you can save some days up til the day your child turns eight and have a few days later on.
Swedish men are more in touch with their feminine side and you see as many "latte dads" as "latte mums" in town.
Dont you know what a "latte parent" is..?
Someone who takes great care when dressing themselves and their little one in matching outfits, has the newest toprange pram and sits in a café most of the day and drink latte with their friends...
Another thing I would say is that English men flirt more and are also more receptive to womens signals than Swedish men. Or they are just more gullable and a little stupid?
Between the age of tewntythree and thirty I could get a man to buy me a drink by just looking at him the right way. It is an advantage to have very blue eyes in England..


So there you have it..or at least a very small part of what is different between living in Sweden and living in England.
I remember when I first decided to go to England to work as an Au-pair, I was contemplating USA aswell, but thought it better to choose England since it was closer to home and probably wouldnt be as different culture wise as I imagined America to be.
Well how wrong I was... I have loved living in England, even though it has been heartbreakingly difficult at times. And I miss it. I miss the feeling of being on a lifelong adventure.


This is the street I used to live in. This photo could have been taken from my roofgarden. Beautiful!
Someone once said, that when another friend of mine also moved to England she left her heart in Sweden.
Well, I have have left a very big piece of my heart in England.